Do they actually listen to the father at all.

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Key Points on Child Custody Protection Act.: An article from: National Right to Life News

This is the first of a 3 part series. After the long and arduous journey from divorce through custody battles and a final order, what are you going to do when exchanging the child breaks down? You need a plan so let’s get to work.

Nothing in this article is going to be easy to accomplish, but it will make your life pleasant again. You have invested a tremendous amount of time and energy in your child custody arrangement. You have done everything that was asked of you at each and every step along the way. You have followed the rules, been respectful and obedient of the laws, the courts, the judges, the attorneys and the other parent. So why do you feel so alone and helpless now that the other parent is creating a problem during exchanges?

The other parent may pull all types of things on exchanges from, showing up late, not showing up at all, demanding money, goods, or even a new agreement in exchange of the child. They may still have feelings for you and demand to know where you were, who you’re with, or what you were doing. They can keep you waiting for hours wondering about the safety of your child. This is just a partial list, but if you can relate to this, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

While you may feel isolated and alone in handling this problem, you are about to find out that you are not. Exchanging the child is a great way for the other parent to create trouble, seemingly without any type of repercussions. This is the perfect time for the other parent to cause problems for you, and oh yeah, this is not uncommon. Join the ranks of the millions of us who have “been there, done that”. Aren’t there laws to protect you? Didn’t you get an order to set boundaries? Why won’t the police help enforce it? Isn’t the system supposed to protect children “best interests of the child”?

Now that you know you aren’t the only one, we need to look at how you’re going to fix this. You read that right, “You’re going to fix this”. The issue here is that while you have an order, the order is civil and not criminal. That means that while an officer might be able to help, you are more likely to hear, “you need to go back to court”. Raise your hand if you’ve heard that and wanted to cry.

I know I was astounded when I heard that. I mean, you spend thousands of dollars, hundreds or thousands of hours working on your custody case to get to an agreement, only to be told “go to court”. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? You have done nothing but go to court and look where it got you, back at square one.

Well guess what, the officer was right. You need to go back to court. But this time, things will be different. Very, very different because this time you will take away the power that allows the other parent to do this to you. If you don’t want your power back, stop reading and move on. If you want to make them cry because they lost a very good thing, keep reading.

Keep in mind that I am very pro-child. I have seen parents do horrendous things to the other parent, other family members, even the child, but the child still has a right to a relationship with that parent. If we don’t ensure that relationship happens, those broken bonds will haunt them all their adult life. So when I talk about taking away the power for them to hurt you, I urge you to protect the child’s relationship with the other parent.

You will need to do all of the work to fix this problem, on your own. There is no agency to call, no one you can pay, you just buckle down, educate yourself and do the work. First, let’s look at our objective. The objective is to get a judge to issue an order that will prevent the other parent from creating trouble. I am not talking about some sissy language that says ”stop it”. I’m talking about restricting the other parent in very objective terms. For instance, a restraining order would be enforceable by the police. Language that states the parent must have no more than 15 minutes of leeway in drop off time or they lose all visitations until the go back to court. You need an order that protects you but doesn’t interfere with the child’s right to visit the other parent. 

I know I was astounded when I heard that. I mean, you spend thousands of dollars, hundreds or thousands of hours working on your custody case to get to an agreement, only to be told “go to court”. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? You have done nothing but go to court and look where it got you, back at square one.

Well guess what, the officer was right. You need to go back to court. But this time, things will be different. Very, very different because this time you will take away the power that allows the other parent to do this to you. If you don’t want your power back, stop reading and move on. If you want to make them cry because they lost a very good thing, keep reading.

Keep in mind that I am very pro-child. I have seen parents do horrendous things to the other parent, other family members, even the child, but the child still has a right to a relationship with that parent. If we don’t ensure that relationship happens, those broken bonds will haunt them all their adult life. So when I talk about taking away the power for them to hurt you, I urge you to protect the child’s relationship with the other parent.

You will need to do all of the work to fix this problem, on your own. There is no agency to call, no one you can pay, you just buckle down, educate yourself and do the work. First, let’s look at our objective. The objective is to get a judge to issue an order that will prevent the other parent from creating trouble. I am not talking about some sissy language that says ”stop it”. I’m talking about restricting the other parent in very objective terms. For instance, a restraining order would be enforceable by the police. Language that states the parent must have no more than 15 minutes of leeway in drop off time or they lose all visitations until the go back to court. You need an order that protects you but doesn’t interfere with the child’s right to visit the other parent.

I have a court order against my then EX boyfriend for child support/visitation/custody. Well now we are back together. What do I do? Should I cancel it all or only cancel visitation? And how do I do this? He’s offering more money to our child weekly if i cancel. Should I believe him? Or should I just cancel visitation and wait to cancel everything else until we are living together or married or something like that? Someone help me!!

Child custody rights are granted by a family court judge to one or two of the parents, grandparents, step-parents, or legal guardians. In custody cases, the courts usually favor the biological parents.

Custody rights are determined based on the best interests of the children. These rights specify who will have physical and legal custody of the child. The payments for child support are also figured out in custody rights cases.

The rights to the custody of a child may be given to only one parent or legal guardian or be shared by both parents. In about 70 percent of cases, primary custody rights are granted to the mother of the child. Fathers are less likely to win custody of their children because of the notion that mothers are better caretakers of children.

About 20 percent of cases award joint custody, in which both parents enjoy an equal amount of custody rights over their children. In this child custody arrangement, parents are allowed by the courts to divide for themselves the custody rights as long as neglect or abuse is not involved.

Custody rights entail both legal and physical responsibilities of the parents. Legal custody rights allow a parent to make major decisions on things that are involved in his or her children’s life such as religion, education, and healthcare. Physical custody rights allow a parent to the child stay with him or her for good.

Barring major disagreements in the wishes of each party, parents can easily determine their rights to custody of their children. However, when both parties cannot reach an agreement, mediation is necessary. Mediation refers to the process that involves intercession of an independent third party to aid parents in making decisions about their custody rights. It can help speed up the process of coming to an agreement of both parties. Once an agreement has been reached and approved by the court, the terms of this agreement can be immediately implemented. If disagreements involving custody rights still ensue, a court hearing will proceed to determine who gets which custody rights.

During the custody hearings, the judge will consider several factors before making a decision about the custody rights of each parent. Usually, courts depend on a psychologist’s expert testimony, which evaluates options for custody rights by examining a number of important factors. Some of the factors that a judge looks into when deciding custody rights include the age of the child, past behavior of the parents at home, preference of the child on who will take care of him or her, stability of the parents’ home, the amount of time a parent can devote for taking care of the child, and the parents’ ability to finance the child’s needs. Children may be invited in the court hearings to testify or to speak privately with the judge.

Now that you have a basic understanding of the child custody rights that you may enjoy after your separation from your spouse, your next step is to ask legal help from an experienced lawyer to make sure that you gain the right custody rights over your child.

Are you involved in a serious tug-of-war with your former spouse regarding the custody of your children? Child custody battles and arrangements can have an impact on your children. Help them cope with the situation by following these tips below.

1. Explain properly your reason for going to court.

Tell your children that you and their other parent are having difficulties reaching an agreement on what is best for them, so you are seeking the help of other people to figure it out. The lawyers and the judge will try their best to determine the best arrangement for the children.

Do not pretend that nothing is going on—your children deserves to know the truth especially if it will concern them in the future. Also, avoid showing your children that you are bitter about the situation and blaming your ex-spouse in front of them. Be honest, but explain the situation in positive terms. Be careful with the words you use so that your children will become calm and comfortable about the situation.

Create a fun and comfortable setting for your children when you explain to them about the divorce and custody arrangements. You can do it in a park or in a quiet spot in your home. Make sure that you will have plenty of time discussing about the situation so that your children can ask questions and get adequate answers.

2. Prepare your child for the court hearings.

This step is important if the judge wishes to talk to your children in private or if your children are required to testify in court. Let your children know what they should expect to happen so that they won’t be scared. You only need to explain that the judge wants to ask your children a few questions so that he can better understand the situation. Try to resist the urge to coach answers against your former spouse or pressure your child to answer according to what you told them because the judge can tell that right away. Just encourage your children to be honest and express what they really want to say.

3. Keep the best interests of your children in mind.

Remember, the court will decide according to the best interests of your children. For sure, you as your children’s parent want it as well. Keep that in mind because the custody hearing may get emotional and quite messy. If you are aiming for the best interests of your children and are doing it without any resentment and bitterness, the judge will take notice of and respect that. This kind of positive attitude will also give your children peace of mind, as they are spared from the tension and animosities between you and the other parent.

Your parenting skills are crucial in ensuring that your children will be able to cope with the child custody arrangements. If you calmly and sufficiently explain what is going on, prepare your child for the court hearing, and prioritize their best interests, then you and your children will be able to manage a stable custody agreement together.

Even though the opposition lawyer hates that. But I hear some judges deslike it as well and they can turt that down.

Would that turn the judge against me?

If you are a parent, settling disputes in child custody is the most financially and emotionally draining legal issue that you do not wish to go through. But due to life’s circumstances like divorce, it is necessary to talk about child’s guardianship. The sad thing is that when parents failed to settle the custody on amicable agreement; legal action should be done to settle the disputes.   

There are laws surrounding child custody that concerns the best interest of the child, who can provide the support and upbringing needed by the child. Of course as a parent you want to provide for your child and there are things you can do to get a favorable child custody arrangement.  

If your spouse declined to agree on a reasonable custody arrangement, you need to take a concrete decision to get a qualified child custody attorney to represent you in court and help you settle disputes in child custody. Have your claims and proposal be known right from the start. Even if the marriage didn’t work, you are still a parent.

Disputes in child custody are not only difficult for parents but especially to their children who need to accept the separation of parents and now need to put up with custody issues. Remember, whatever happens, your best interest as a parent is the welfare of your child. Re-assure your child that what is happening is not his/her fault and you want the best for him/her.   

Getting positive results in settling disputes in child custody is not an easy feat but there are help available for you. Dr. Barry Bricklin and Dr. Gail Elliot, two of the country’s most famous and respected child custody experts, have developed a unique program that gives you the best chance of wining a favorable custody arrangement. Find out how visit Child Custody: Psychologists Strategies.

To know more about home and family visit All About Home and Family.

My b/f lives in NYS, his ex and his son live in Michigan. Has anyone had to deal between these two states for child support and custody?

We are both military. He wants him during the school year and I cant even imagine that happening. He wants me to have him during the summer and that just cant happen. I tried to compromise with him but nothing helps. What do I do?